Well after the weekend I have had, All I can do is share some of the wisdom I have learnt (Although most can be avoided if you are a person where common sense usually prevails)
1. Don't bet on 5 horses in the national for 'long odds' because all that happens is your wallet ends up a lot lighter than the beginning of the day.
2. Empty Stomach + Several Jugs of Cocktails + Fresh Air = Disaster
PLEASE EAT BEFORE BINGE DRINKING
3. Hangovers are better in Winter when it stays darker for longer in the morning.
4. When performing a Rugby Tackle on a friend, be sure to do it on a malleable surface and NOT Concrete.
5. Don't wear a watch when playing rugby on concrete as itll end up smashed into smithereens.
6. If you are gonna try and sleep with a bird at her parents house, dont get caught sneaking in and get asked to leave. Then when you do sneak back in, don't get caught naked in the middle of sex.
7. You can't unlock a door, then claim to have lost your keys.. Its an invalid argument.
8. When you lose your phone, phone it to determine where it is. Dont accuse your friends, nor accuse every stranger walking past who looks 'shifty'
9. When a hangover beckons, get up and have some water and fresh air. Does you the world of good.
10. Dont wear brand new white trainers to the beach. Bad Idea.
This advice was brought to you by the Cunny Got Stupidly Drunk Foundation.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment